Using Perfectly Good Air

So I wonder, after living over half a century, if I have made any difference at all.

My life is nothing like I dreamed about as a kid. It is not even close to what I worked for in college.

I have many things to celebrate, but many disappointments.

Would they make It's Wonderful Life about my life? I sort of doubt it.

Have I done what God intended for me to do?

Why do I seem to have so few real options?

Has my life mattered at all?

Will my kids amount to anything?

And why the heck isn't the second season of Lost out on DVD yet? (Who were those perverts on the boat at the end of season one anyway?)

....And Many More?

Today is my birthday.

It is a rather sad one. It is the first one without a call or card from my mom and dad. In fact, the only cards I have gotten so far are from corporate entities, although I did get one from my home church in CA-really very nice.

Birthdays are funny things. They are a huge deal when you are young-gifts, theme parties , lots of cards for the new little one, etc. If you have one during the school year,class parties often happen. My kids get a shirt delivered to their room and everybody has cupcakes, etc.

As time goes on, the attention wanes. Maybe at 16 there is some big celebration, and 21 is usually a big one (for many, involving alcohol-no more cake and ice cream). I remember how sad it was after my grandparents died. No more gifts or calls-they always remembered. And now, the only other ones who always remembered are gone, mom and dad. I still have the money they gave me last year, sitting on my desk. (I have been unable to decide what to get with it-I want it to mean something.) My mom was determined to give me a check-dad couldn't write any more.

Now, I wasn't ignored this year. My wife and kids and some friends came over for some cake and ice cream last night (my wife actually got confused on what day it was, but hey, no big....) And my brother and I will celebrate our birthdays next week together (his was June 26).

But the phone was silent, the mailbox empty. No longer will there be the reminiscing of the day I was born, the stories, the unbelief that 53 years have passed since little Robby was born that Sunday morning in Walla Walla, Washington. It is pretty humbling that everyone who helped bring me into the world is gone now.

And so it goes for all of us.

Pass some more cake please.

Legacy

Happy 4th!

John Adams wrote in 1776 that the 4th of July should be remembered by feasts, games, and fireworks. And so we do, some 230 years later. Tonite (they do it early here) we will once again oooh and ahhh as we watch the fireworks go off in the sky above us. My kids love the 4th and we play patriotic music for about 2 weeks before the day each year. I will always remember them singing "Its a Grand Old Flag" at the top of their lungs in the car when they were little, after they learned it in school. Even just this morning, my 11-year old daughter was singing "the Star Spangled Banner" with gusto in her room while she got dressed.

But do we remember the cost-and those who first paid it?

I love Ben Franklyn's reported words as he left the hall after voting for the Declaration of Independence. A women asked him, "Well Mr. Franklyn, what have you given us?"

"A republic, Madam", he replied. "...if you can keep it".

The history of the signers is sobering. Many of them died in the following war or lost their families and homes. Franklyn became permantly estranged from his son and grandchildren, who sided with the British. Some became destitute. Often portrayed today as rich land owners trying to get out of paying taxes, the signers paid a dear price for their actions, and few, if any, got richer.

As we celebrate, I want my children to understand that because of many, many people's sacrifices, we are still free.

Yes Mr. Franklyn, we have kept it, thanks to the Grace of God and the courage He has instilled in so many hearts over the years. For how much longer, no one knows. But I for one, am grateful to live in the "land of the free, ....and the home of the brave" (and I hope you sang that last part!)